It’s
impossible to go into a movie like Return to Silent Hill (2026) without
certain expectations. That’s the nature of adaptations. This one faced
additional challenges in that it didn’t just have to compete with the game
franchise (’90’s graphics? Shouldn’t be too hard, right?) it also had to
compete with 2006 adaptation.
Which,
let’s be honest, is a lot to live up to!
ChristopheGans KILLED it. The soundtrack, the atmosphere, the casting, the baddies… it
was all spot-on.
So why
even attempt a reboot?
Sadly, I’m
still asking myself that question.
We went to see Return to Silent Hill opening night and, as we were
leaving the cinema, Jay said he thought it was a tale
of three parts and I can’t beat that description. It started strong. (Jay counted
three jumps in the first third, which is how he judges whether a horror movie
is good or not: how often it frightens me.)
The
beginning was intriguing. It was eerie, it was atmospheric, it was gory. Better
than any of that, though, was the way it put you right in the middle of the
action. Masterful use of angles, focus, and depth of field made it feel like
you were in the game. The sirens went off, the monsters came out, and…
Wait. What the
hell?
That was
the second part of the movie, just wondering what the fuck was happening. It
got weird. Not curious weird, just disjointed and confusing weird.
Which is
better than the final part.
Fuck this
shit.
The ending
succeeded in actually making me angry. With such a good start, and enduring the
weirdness of the middle, I was expecting a much better payoff.
We
deserved a much better payoff.
What we
got was lazy writing and the most obvious, cliched, saccharine “resolution.” I kept waiting
for the nasty twist that would make it all better…
…yeah, still
waiting.
*sigh*
I don’t
understand how a movie that did so much right could get it all so wrong. To
start strong, to have the effects and soundtrack, to queue up what should have
been the best reboot since 2004’s Dawn of the Dead – only to get confused about
what it was supposed to be doing and throw in the towel with an ending a
freaking AI bot could have bettered. (Nah, scratch that. It’s exactly the kind of BS ending an AI bot would have come up with.)
Remember
when you were supposed to write a paper for school and you were kind of excited and threw yourself into it, only to get distracted and forget about it until the night before
it was due so you had to scribble some crap and hope the teacher would give you
credit for finishing it? (No? Just my late-diagnosed AuDHD ass? Lol.) Well, that’s what Return
to Silent Hill felt like.
What
annoyed me more than the lackluster ending, though, was the fact that this
version didn’t do anything to explain… well… anything. It either assumed
you played the game (or saw the 2006 adaptation) or just didn’t care why elements vital to the game were even there.
I should
point out a couple of things here that have an effect on my opinion. One, I’m a casual
player. I have a general knowledge of what should be happening, but I’m not in
a position to nitpick over minor details. Two, I realize that the Silent Hill
franchise is notorious for multiple endings so, technically, they could get
away with just about any ending.
(Even
alien invasion. Lol.)
Doesn’t
mean I have to like it.
And
thirdly, I’m well aware that Return to Silent Hill is (arguably) more
faithful to the actual plot of the games than the 2006 adaptation. In
capturing the franchise’s essence, however, it is far less so.
For me? Return
to Silent Hill was a total disappointment. Not poorly made, as such, because
the audiovisuals were solid, but certainly poorly written. A good adaptation
should be enjoyable for the die-hard fans, the casual fans, and people who’ve
never switched on a PlayStation in their lives.
I hear
those kinda freaks do actually exist. *gasp*
Return
to Silent Hill doesn’t
offer much for people who aren’t already fans and, if you ask me, doesn’t offer all that much for those of us who are.
Rating: ⭐⭐⭐ (3/5 stars)
